Wendy Mogel Ph.D



Illustration by Sami Gaston

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Atlanta Jewish Times

January 28, 2005

Mogel’s Myths
Twelve Misconceptions
About Raising Self-Reliant Kids


1. These days all children are either learning disabled, gifted or both.


2. If they just try hard enough and are taught well, any child has what it takes to become a neurosurgeon or a high tech CEO.


3. In our competitive world, it’s important to give each child an edge by scheduling enrichment activities, lessons and tutors. It’s less important to let them waste time farting around or daydreaming or to burden them with ordinary household chores.


4. In order to survive in the coming millennium, every child needs to be a robust generalist who is good at everything. Learning is a not a process that lasts a lifetime but a product that must be manufactured by the end of middle school.


5. It is respectful and appropriate to continue all discussions with children until they understand the rationale for what we want them to do…or not to do.


6. A bright, articulate child can distinguish between what he wants and what he needs.


7. Praise builds self-esteem. Every child needs to feel very special.


8. Children need less sleep than they used to.


9. If we raise them right, our children’s level of sexual interest should be about the same as ours was when we were their age.


10. It is not good for children to feel bored, unhappy, disappointed, sad, frustrated or left out.


11. These days, it’s just too dangerous to give children privacy in the house or freedom on the streets.


12. My children should come before my marriage, before my hobbies, before… everything.

 

January 28, 2005